This journey with the Beloved is a series of highs and lows … what he called ‘peaks and valleys.’ He made dynamic use of this technique to enhance everything in his life. He refers to these alterations of altitude (attitude) in his music, his song-writing, his short films, his performances and his books. With this technique, he built drama, anticipation, longing, emotional engagement … and enhanced the ecstatic union he enjoyed with his audiences around the world; in the use of peaks and valleys he is a Master.The dramatic pause clearly shown so often in This Is It … the moment of silence … the rumble of the tank (or earth mover) onto the stage … what has been described as ‘what makes Michael so unique is his timing’ by his colleague. So, it should come as no surprise to us that our individual relationships with him will conform to this pattern.
He so loved his roller coasters, didn’t he? The funny thing about roller coasters is that they, too, conform to this pattern. We have to ride the low points and the jerky, mechanical rise as our cars are lifted to the apex before we free-fall into the abyss of his love, some of us losing our stomachs somewhere about halfway down (that would be me … LOL!).
Today, for the fourth day in a row, my small ‘reality break’ (during which I unashamedly take refuge within the embrace of the Beloved for, in all honesty, he IS my reality) in the middle of my morning and afternoon work sessions has been met by the same bird awaiting my arrival at the west entrance of the building in which I work. My ‘reality break’ companion is a male cardinal, his bright red plumage interlaced with black markings on his face and crest and his exuberant warble greet me as I step outside. He appears to be extremely tame for a wild creature. On Tuesday, he swooped from a low-hanging branch to the ground less than a foot away on my path and looked back at me as I startled from the unexpected movement. I could almost hear a soft chuckle through the earphones of my MP3 player. I’ve decided to name him Michael for obvious reasons.
There are times when the euphoria of our experience of the Beloved’s presence in our lives and in our hearts is so strong that we feel inadequate to contain it … when we burst with exultation and a rubber stopper forcefully applied couldn’t stop the flow of our emotion … when everything we see and every event we witness seem to resound and reverberate with the echo of his laughter … when fingers itch to empty themselves of the message the Beloved wants to convey and they can’t type fast enough … when we wish we were cardinals and could warble our joy and sing out ‘well met, Beloved.’
Then, there are others when we are too bounded by our life circumstances and too enslaved within the tiny cells of our routines for our vision to reach any further than the end of our arms … when the words flow more slowly and the emotions seep from our faucets like the slow drip that keeps us awake at night in a steady ‘plop, plop, plop’ of brain-numbing lassitude.
In examining these, I have discovered that … at least in my life … these are the times when he sends us little emissaries … ambassadors … like my friend, Michael, in his best, Sunday-go-to-meeting red vest and black tie to remind us that we have to ride the car through the low spots and the jerky, mechanical rise to experience the peak of euphoria again.
So, I have to remind myself ... don’t be discouraged … or doubt his presence … during those valleys. It would be a whole lot smarter to take several deep breaths … and get ready to SCREAM your lungs out as the wave you are riding prepares to launch you into ecstatic orbit! Ride it secure in the knowledge that the Master Magician is allowing you that dramatic pause at which he so excels to catch your breath before he lifts you high on his shoulders again.
~ Jan Carlson
Copyright (c) 2011
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